So I found this website called Nerd Fitness which I’ve signed up for, not paid signed up, just email signed up. That was only about 4 days ago, and each day I’ve had an email to guide me on my journey.
As the name should suggest it’s fitness for nerds. So for example yesterday I was asked to pick my class. Here is some information about the classes you can choose. After some careful consideration I decided I would be a Ranger. I really wanted to be a Warrior, but I think I maybe need to work up to that and the Ranger seemed like a good place to start. Funny how my main in World of Warcraft is a Hunter too, clearly some past life shit coming through here. I really liked that the Ranger was a mix of strength and endurance attributes, and as for my race, well I’m certainly no Elf (slender and lean). I didn’t find any info on what races were available but I’m only 5’3″, should I be a Gnome or a Hobbit, certainly don’t have the strength to be a Dwarf (not yet anyway)? It’s a sad story when it comes to how strong I am, my SO often comments on how I have knots on a thread when referring to my muscles, or apparent lack of. I’d like to think I was a little braver than a Hobbit, though we know Hobbits can have their moments when they need to. Having read some of the comments in the post I linked, someone asked if they could be a Pandaren since “I’m pudgy. I play. I sleep. I eat.” I loved this idea so I’m going to pinch it! Sleep is one of my very favourite things in the whole world. Since having my son last November I haven’t had nearly as much sleep as I used to though.
So here we are, Pandaren Ranger. Now what? Well it just so happens I got today’s email (Day 4) about an hour ago. When I got the email I still hadn’t decided what class I was going to be, I was getting all confused. It’s the reason I’ve redesigned this blog, to get it the thoughts down and see where I end up, and right enough it worked.
I do have a bit of catching up to do though. It’s encouraged me to go out for 10 minute walks for 2 days in a row (Days 1 and 2 of emails). Today I took J (my son) out for a walk in the pram to Tesco and was out for an hour. I think that pretty much covers my 10 minute walk for the day!
Day 3 was the make 1 step to improve my diet. It wasn’t looking for a massive radical change, just 1 small change. Lots of small improvements over a period of time are going to have a higher success rate than trying to improve everything right now. So what is the small improvement I should make? I feel very VERY guilty about the fact that I had an entire bag of Malteasers at lunchtime, and I don’t mean just a regular sized bag, like the bags you buy at the cinema. After checking the bag which I’ve just fished out of the bin I realise it’s a whopping 520 calories for the whole bag.
Let me tell you something. I binge eat when I’m bored. I binge eat when I’m upset or stressed.
My maternity leave finishes next Tuesday. I’m terrified of going back to work. I’m looking forward to seeing everyone again, but I honestly don’t know how I’m going to cope leaving my son for 12 hours a day 5 days a week. I don’t know how I’m going to cope with not being able to have an afternoon nap. I am also very worried about my fitness. I once ran a half marathon, now walking a mile leaves me seriously out of breath. I tried to exercise at home using the Wii U and Your Shape: Fitness Evolved and I was mortified to find that every time I bounced or jumped I would pee myself a little. Clearly I need to work more on the pelvic floor muscles. By the end of the workout my pants and trousers were soaking with pee. I was quite looking forward to getting back to the gym at the uni and going to classes on my lunch break but now I can’t do that if I’m going to pee myself.
So I am having some serious anxiety issues about going back to work and my current fitness level. Binge eating has been something that’s been happening more and more in the past few weeks, though it’s been a problem since I was a teenager. It would seem that I can’t simple have 1 square of chocolate. I need to eat the whole fucking bar. Then I feel sick after it, and then guilty and depressed about it, then I think well I’ve fucked up today, I might well start again tomorrow.
I’m not entirely sure how to tackle this issue. Do I cut it out altogether or do I force myself to learn how to only have a little?
I’m pretty sure that I want my 1 improvement to have something to do with this issue. Perhaps since I’ve already demolished that giant bag of Malteasers, today’s goal should just be to have no more chocolate because I’ve already have more than my quota for today. Then what should tomorrow’s goal be? Go 1 day without chocolate. If I am unable to eat it in moderation then perhaps cutting it out altogether is the best way to go.
Before I fell pregnant I was doing pretty good with weight loss and eating better. I had a routine that I would be really really good everyday, but then on a Friday I would have what I wanted. Of course the first few Fridays that came up I went hell for leather stuffing my face, but over time, when it came to a Friday I didn’t feel the need to do that. It seemed to really work for me then. I said to myself “I can’t have this today, but if I still want it on Friday then I shall have it then”.
Right that’s it decided. No more chocolate, and if I want any, then I can have it on Friday. That’s going to be my first improvement to my diet.
I had no idea what I would write here today but simply getting down things on virtual paper has really helped me find my starting point.
So to today’s email, Day 4, I have been given 2 quests! I’ve to do some beginner body weight exercises and answer the following question “What is the #1 hurdle holding you back from the fitness and life you most desire?”
Answer: Peeing every time I exercise.